Honor | 尊嚴

Do the Right Thing

Especially When Nobody is Watching

It seems lately that AA needs more heroes and examples in it's ranks and fewer special and unique sunflowers. In my first few years I remember eagerly scanning the room looking for the 'winners'. I didn't want to be a waiter forever; I desperately wanted to improve myself. However, usually I was assured that 'I was in the right place', to stay 'right sized', etc. That was complete and utter bovine scatology.

Thanks to a select few, I was encouraged to take chances, get an education, to aim for higher things in life than simply 'freedom from alcohol'. As a result, I've emerged from from four generations of Brooklyn white trash to a relatively happy, joyous and free position in society, all because I was encouraged to do better. I've sat with presidents, Kings and Queens. I've traveled the world, and I've met God. Twice. Not bad for a guy who used to live in a box. All because of heroes in AA encouraging me to do better.

The first step up and out was my language; I spoke with complete disregard for those around me. My sponsor fixed that one very simply: 'Don't Talk'. In 99 cases out of 100 you can bring a newcomer from breaking most of the traditions to observing all of them by simply gagging them. And if you are laboring under the mistaken impression that 'talking' is a solution to alcoholism, read a book. You either require clarification, medication or a meeting list for another fellowship.

I don't mean to be prudish but certainly we can agree that cursing like a truck driver and dressing like a whore in a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous is inappropriate, yes? Can we get together on self respect, egalitarianism, equanimity and rectitude? When did it become fashionable to be a loser?

Today, I try to honor AA be setting the best possible example that I can. That means I try to do the right thing always - especially when nobody is looking; for somebody usually is. It means keeping my seat when a 'lady' soils herself verbally from the podium and I try to remain stoic because I know the poor few disillusioned women she is sponsoring depend upon her for guidance, and unfortunately she is all they got. That poor woman is half Avon Lady, half Gutter Snipe. She's one step behind the jailbird wallowing in the drama of captivity. In case you haven't been told - if you're a felon, you've lost. Game over. Shut up, do the steps and stop blaming society because you're an idiot and your parents did a horrific job raising you..

Today, heroism is standing up in front of a room and saying the right thing - only because you know God is counting on somebody to do it. Today, as a result of heroes in AA, I have integrity - that means I am always the same person under all conditions and persons - no better, no less. Right sized under God's guidance, and to do so without banality.

Could you just bumble along in AA, without God and lofty goals? I guess that's possible - even the Book admits twice that their it doesn't have a mortal lock on sobriety. However, the question begs to be asked: why would you have it any other way?

Yours in love and service,

COG, 1st Cl.

|...today is 71&72/90. Goals are good - there is light at the end of the tunnel. I am eager to pursue my studies more aggressively, resume training and finish setting up our Big Book Study. I love that clubhouse but I will die there - I need to consistently hear a message of depth and weight or I will perish. I cannot be part of a group that does not respect itself; that would not be honorable. After siting next to two gibbons gibbering for 90 minutes I'm about done.

COG, 1st Cl.|